I spent $20 on a nail in a coffin.
When I was drinking, I kept on doing it until my mind and body objected so strenuously and violently that I had no choice but to give it up. The same thing happened today with World of Warcraft: Warlords of Draenor. Some of the same things that I had experienced on the private Wrath of the Lich King server were present in my gaming experience: I spent the better part of 8-10 hours leveling from 90 to 92.5 by helping the brolords beat up fat ogres. I set up all the old AddOns, did one dungeon in which we one-shotted all of the bosses except one (DBM was vomiting warnings and confusing me), and logged out in medias res in Gorgrond in the middle of completing two quests. During this time, I screamed at myself inside using an increasingly unruly child’s voice.
Hells to the noes.
I accepted the truth of the situation and uninstalled. I simply do not have the mental capacity to accommodate so much psychological infrastructure surrounding a historically enjoyable game in modern contexts. The character and account remain intact. The free month of game time expires at the end of the month. I have spent as much in the past on one night of drinking; the difference in this case is that this particular habit is far less expensive even though it has turned out to be comparably insidious. The effects were irritability, neglect, and sloth. The associated gaming habits have once again made me mildly physically ill, just as they did when I ultra-binged on WildStar a year ago. I am not suggesting some sort of superstitious synchronicity, just drawing parallels.